Tuppenny Tide, Tuppenny Tide, this is The Tale of Tuppenny Tide!
At Tuppenny Tide, we kid you not, financial woes are set aside.
It’s far away, we regret to say, but the journey there is quite a ride.
Where does it lie?! When can we go!?
Calm friends! We will confide! Gather your things and tally ho!
See that carpet over there? Tis magic thread, floats in the air!
Hop on board, ahoy, away! We’re off to Tuppenny Tide this day!
Our travel guide is Alison, a bona fide Fairy w’mon
Sparkly hair and fluttery wings,
She carries a bell that goes ding-a-ling-ling!
We’re off, we’re off, we’re rising high!
Hold on tight as you learn to fly!
Down below you can clearly see,
The Kingdom of Unmitigated Glee
Never a tear, never a sigh, in that Kingdom will you find.
You can hear the cheers and see grinning mugs,
From way up here on on our magic rug!
Such a happy place it is to be,
That they never feel the need to flee
And thus know not of Tuppenny Tide!
Tuppenny Tide, it belongs to us,
No one knows so don’t make a fuss!
Hark! Ahoy! What’s that ahead?
Why it’s Brian the Wizard with the Big Head!
Be quiet and calm, or he may see red…
A magic carpet I can see!
How very marvellous and so free!
Where are you going and what is your quest?
Some time with you I’d like to invest,
I’m fed up of Glee, as you can guess!
Why Brian, it’s you, how do you do?
We’d love you to join our carpet crew!
Sadly though there isn’t space,
We’re choc-a-bloc on this race!
Good day to you, you Wizarding ace!
Ding-a-ling-ling, that’s Alison’s bell,
We’re away and escaped that quite well!
Big Head Brian is full of greed!
With him onboard, it’s unwise to proceed,
Tuppenny Tide in him would plant an evil seed!
Through the clouds and over that hill,
Arrive at the Tide soon we will!
It’s full of calm, it never rains,
All the dragons there have been slain,
It’s safe enough, pretty as can be, just to see it is a thrill!
We’re here, we’re here! We can’t believe our eyes!
Yes we are and we told no lies!
Step off the rug and see for yourselves,
A beach made entirely of copper coins and shells!
Take what you like, for the coins regrow whenever the Big Black Bird crows.
The Big Black Bird! It’s there! She’s really quite near!
She’s magical and awesome but full of such fear!
Her wrath isn’t one you want to endure,
For the impact, there is no known cure!
Quick, grab your coins and let’s get out of here!
Ding-a-ling-ling goes Alison’s bell,
We sense foreboding, as that was more of a knell!
Quick, quick! Hop on, we must away this instant!
The Bird is watching, she’s preparing to yell!
It’s been a pleasure Tuppenny Tide, it’s time to leave you in the distance.
We hope you had a wonderful time,
On this Fairy Tale Adventure Rhyme.
We voyage out once every year,
To collect coins and see the sea so clear.
Goodbye, farewell, and save your dimes, from The Tale of Tuppenny Tide.